I used to be a Christian


When I tell you I was on fire for Jesus Christ, I mean I actually went to Divinity school because I thought it was the next logical decision in “becoming an evangelist”.

Yep, ya girl is technically two semesters shy of a Masters in Divinity.

Something very unexpected happened once I started studying the Bible. 

I began to get discouraged and even disappointed at what seemed like in the justification of rape, pillage and murder. Slavery and The Crusades were two devastating historical events that had manipulatively intertwined Christianity with their jaded perspective on the “Word of God”.

To me it felt like the religion was being used as justification for men to forcefully and violently conquer the world. 

I had come to feel like Christianity gave people an excuse to not be their best selves by putting responsibility on another man. You know the whole “Jesus saved me” thing.

It didn’t make sense to me that such a young religion could encompass all time. Like, a remote Asian monk alive well over 2021 years ago and never even heard of, let alone proclaimed Jesus Christ as their Lord and Savior was going to hell? Nah. An unlikely story.

I’d also had some negative church experiences along with observing a bunch of hypocritical “Christian” behavior and scandal.

I decided that GOD was way to big for religion.

So, it comes great shock for me to share with you today that almost 15 years later I’ve been magnetized back to the word of God, through the Bible.

Don’t get me wrong I always knew that the bible was a source of profound words. Throughout my spiritual journey I’ve been referred back to it for wisdom and insight. Proverbs is my favorite book.

My favorite passage (thus far) is:

Proverbs 18:21 “The tongue has the power of life and death.” The stakes are high. Your words can either speak life, or your words can speak death. Our tongues can build others up, or they can tear them down. An unchecked fire doubles in size every minute.

I came across some books by Florence Scovel Shinn, they are all scripture-based.

Do you know what the difference is that has me completely rethinking my entire belief system? 


I’ll share one of the most impactful perspective shifts that her writings on interpreting scripture had for me.

Shepherds and sheep. 🐑 

The sheep are likened the rational, chitchat thoughts of the conscious mind.

If you consider the way sheep move, they’re chaotic, in pacts, moving quickly and not really committed to a space nor a destination.  

Sheepish thoughts are really all different interpretations of fear, worry and lack. They race mindlessly through our heads with no true purpose or goal.

The shepherd of those sheep are the prompters found our sub-conscious mind. In the book “3 Magic Words” it’s referred to as the super-conscious. Sometimes I’ve seen it called God or Christ Consciousness. 

This consciousness assists us in creating what we impress upon it the most. If we’re entertaining the sheep that run through our mind then we are actually creating the fear worry and lack they represent. 

If we entertain positive images and phrases (through imagination and affirmations) we are also creating the same.

What are your default thoughts? What does the voice inside your mind say?

Observation is life changing and the use of affirmations from this perspective is crucial.

Similar to a shepherd who stands on the perimeter of a boundary to herd the sheep and prevent them from going off course, once you mindfully notice your mind telling you things that don’t feel good, you can begin repeating the affirmations you have in your toolbox.

Having shepherds (memorized desired affirmations) to go to when the sheep ( our critical and negative, whining and ungrateful sheepish thoughts) start to get out of control allows God’s divine will for your life to unfold. 

Our default sheepish mind is typically based on past negative experiences and dynamics that we do NOT want to repeat.

I’ve begun doing this for the past few days and I am already seeing shifts and opportunities that I wouldn’t have thought possible last week.


I wanted to share one of her audiobooks with you that I’ve listen to last with you because it has absolutely 100% given me a lot of clarity and change the way I look at life for the better.

On another note, a little birdie told me that Yes God Wellness will soon be offering in person steam services again along with a Virtual Steam Club. I’m excited to share the details once they all come to fruition!!!

I hope your Sunday is blessed and peaceful.

With So Much Love,



One thought on “I used to be a Christian

  1. “Shepherds (memorized desired affirmations) to go to when the Sheep ( our critical and negative, whining and ungrateful sheepish thoughts) start to get out of control allows God’s divine will for your life to unfold.”

    This phrase (entire passage) is so very appropriate and relatable for me. I have been doing quite a bit of reconciliation while working thru the hurts/confusions/trust issues of my life and PERCEPTION (observation) is a BIG part of the process.

    Thanks for lending a hand in my Healing… Yes GOD🙏🏼


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